Pegine’s Motivational Times Newsletter:

Title: Consequences of Seeing the World with Self Centered Eyes
Copyright Pegine Echevarria, MSW 2004
Date: October 04 Volume 5 Issue 10

You may be overseeing a volunteer staff, office mates in one location, or several sites in different parts of the world. While running around doing your job, you will encounter the person that causes others aggravation, angst and frustration and you will feel your energy drain as you seek to deal with the situation.

In a volunteer situation your volunteers may quit, or as an employer you will find low productivity, passive/aggressive behavior and small personality conflicts, all caused by one person who sees their world only from their eyes.

OR

Perhaps you are the person causing the problems, because of how you are relating to others or because you are focused on your world ….instead of seeking to learn how others see the world?

There is a simple test:

• Do you think your way is the best or the only way?
• Do you point fingers at everyone else?
• Do you feel that you know what everyone else is thinking?
• Do you think they don’t like you are out to get you, or they ‘hate’
you?
• Do you find yourself thinking (if you’re a woman) that the ‘men’
don’t want you to get the job?
• If you are Hispanic, African American, Native American or any other
disenfranchised group, do you feel that “they” are out to keep you down?
• If you are a white male, do you feel that the world is blaming you
for everything?
• If you are middle class or grew up poor do you think the “rich” are
crooks and out to scam you?

If you think that the world is out to get you and hates you, you are right, because you will only see situations that validate your thoughts or feelings – you will never see the other side.

However, if you think the world is basically good, then it is your responsibility to see the best and learn how to help people be their best.
You do this by talking and asking questions, so that you learn how people think and learn how to work with them.

You remove your self centeredness and become focused on the task at hand,
to serve your group’s goal. The month’s newsletter is about the
Consequences of Seeing the World with Self Centered Eyes, while giving tips and kick butt actions to minimize the effects of self centered negative actions.

Thank you in advance for forwarding this issue to your staff, co-workers, business associates and anyone interested in increasing productivity, increasing their ability to achieve, and increasing their ability to manage and be part of an effective team! I am dedicated to the personal and professional success of each and every one of you!

If someone sent this newsletter along to you know that you can receive a free copy of Pegine’s new e-book "Go Fish: For Friends, Business and Opportunities" when you sign up for her free Monthly Motivational Times Newsletter at www.pegine.com. This networking how-to book will allow you to be more successful by making you more confident and better prepared to meet people when you go to meetings, conferences and parties!

Thank you for referring me for:
Conferences, Facilitation needs, Team Building Events, Coaching and Consulting Projects

Your all access pass to your potential!
With you in mind,
Pegine

In this months e-zine you will find
• Pegine’s Thought of the Month
• Quote of the Month
• Try-its – Simple Steps for Magnificent Rewards
• Kick Butt Actions – Strategies to make an impact
• News from Pegine
• E-zine Recommendations
• Spam Alert – make sure your receive your newsletter

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Pegine’s Thought of the Month:
“We each look at our world through our own perspective. Relationships grow and productivity increases when we are willing to see the world from the perspectives of other people and other departments. How do we do find out what they see? We learn how they see their world by asking them their opinions and views.

Pegine Echevarria, MSW


Quotes of the Month:
“When one knows a number of things, and understands how they are categorized and systematically interrelated, then he has a great advantage over one who has the same knowledge without such distinction.”
© by Mercava Productions c/o 19 Lower Village GateSuite 302Toronto, Ontario M5P 3L9 http://www.neveh.org/winston/forest/forest03.html

“My effectiveness in leading, relating to, or working with others is highly dependent on their perceptions of me. I may not agree with what they see, but their perception is our reality. Those around me have an opinion of who they think the real me is. Their perceived "truth" becomes the way they treat me. Their perception forms their part of the reality of our relationship.”

Jim Clemmer http://www.clemmer.net/excerpts/feedback.shtml


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Try-its:

For Yourself:

BE AWARE of your own insecurities. Been there – done that. While I’m writing this I have to be honest with you and share that during my professional life I’ve felt uncomfortable reaching out to others. It is hard. Each time I’ve reached a new level I meet different people who, in my past life, would have intimidated me. During those moments those creepy feelings of both insecurity and grandiosity want to stop me from creating a fuller, deeper relationship with peers and with potential business partners. They are my warning bell that says reach out and connect with others, immediately. If I don’t, my world will never open up and I will pay the consequences.

The consequences are:
- Business that was lost because I didn’t hear about the opportunities
because I wasn’t there or didn’t ask for the business.
- Friends who I could have helped and who were going through tough
times that I wasn’t aware of because I didn’t go to a social gathering because of my own self centered insecurities.
- Promotional opportunities that escaped me because I didn’t ask what
people were looking for.

1. Open yourself to new experiences. Break out of your normal routine.
Go to lunch or dinner at a different type of restaurant then you would normally go. Try different foods. While there ask the owner or server how their restaurant is different than others. Practice asking questions.
After, list two things you didn’t know after the conversation.
2. If you are manager, plan on spending time with each of your staff
members. Have one on one breakfast, coffee break or brown bag lunch meetings. Your goal is to learn something that you didn’t know about the person. You are looking to expand and get to know your staff in a new light.
3. If you are a business person, meet with at least two people each
week. Have lunch with them and learn about what they need or and how you can help. Ask questions so that you can understand why they do what they do.

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Are you a marketing or public relations person?
Do you want to reach educated, leaders and future leaders?
Do you want to reach a diverse audience?
Are you looking for opportunities to reach diverse audiences on college campuses?
Sponsor Pegine, her products or hire her as your spokesperson.
We have groups that want our services and are looking for sponsors.
Pegine is a skilled spokesperson who can carry your message to the people and media venues you want to reach.

Call (904) 280-8806 or email info@pegine.com

Please help us help others by referring us to someone who would be interested in reaching these markets.

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Kick-butt actions for Leaders

Here are some hard core kick butt actions that you as a leader can do to coach and communicate to the person that causes others aggravation, angst, and frustration.

1- Be honest. Tell the truth and use the traffic light method. Green,
tell them what they have done well, Yellow- Tell them what they need to be aware of so that they can improve and RED – Tell them the exact behavior
that they need to stop immediately. By following the traffic light method
you engage people so that they can listen and then CHOOSE to change.
2- If you have communicated your concerns, (using the method above) and
documented the conversation for both of you, set a time within the next two weeks to review progress. Hold yourself accountable to follow up. This is the only way you will hold others accountable. During the accountability meeting be prepared to review the positive changes, the areas that you have seen some improvement but want to see continued improvement and then be honest if they have not stopped the disruptive behavior. Document once again for yourself and for them.
3- Review your steps with your HR department.
4- After 30 days from the last accountability meeting have another
meeting.
a. If there is no change and no willingness to change you MUST let that
person move on. Be clear that THEY made the choice. THEY chose not to change.
b. If there is change then acknowledge it and reward the person. A small
plant or a book about growing plants is great, especially if you include the note saying “You were willing to grow and make positive changes, congratulations”
5- Make follow up accountability meetings every three months. Sooner if
things start slipping. Change is hard, being willing to change is a courageous act as manager you can coach them to victory over negative behavior.
6- You may be intimidated to take this route. Get over it and be
courageous, your team depends on you.

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News from Pegine:

Dear friends,

Jon Gordon, a friend, known as the Energy Coach and author of “Energy
Addict: 101 Mental, Physical, and Spiritual Ways to Energize Your Life,”
was just on NBC’s Today Show energizing millions of viewers and as a result, he is offering a special promotion for his book as part of his on-going Get Energized Today series and desire to help you energize your life!

We highly recommend that you take a look at the book and his special offer.
This book is worth its weight in gold but you can order it today on Amazon.com for only $11.16. Jon is also giving you over $500 in free bonus gifts just to say thanks. While you’re there, be sure to sign up for Jon’s free Energy e-Newsletter. It’s a weekly energy boost that I’m sure you will enjoy!

Simply visit http://www.jongordon.com/Amazon.htm for details.

Sincerely,

Pegine

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E-zine Recommendations

www.AchieveEzine.com a wonderful site that I recently came across. It is filled with information that will help you achieve.
Outstanding contributions by some of the best self-help authors in the world accompany this weekly newsletter about what works in his life, and what doesn't. Click here to visit Friday's Inspiration or www.n-spire.com Josh Hinds has one of the most comprehensive motivational and self help sites on the web. He is also a great guy. Go to his website at http://www.getmotivation.com to get inspired.

You may have heard that Attitude is Everything! Jeff Keller is the master of attitude. I’ve received his material for over seven years and always find nuggets of truth! www.attitudeiseverything.com

www.AsAManThinketh.net If you have not read the classic motivational book, As A Man Thinketh, now you can for free as an e-book, just go to this great site and sign up for their free newsletter.

Pegine is described by magazines as one of the nation’s top motivational success and leadership experts with business and team building experience!
Her teambuilding and motivational programs are experiential, fun and filled with content. Companies use her to motivate people, develop strong leaders & teams, and increase productivity. Her appearances on CNN, MSNBC, and major networks are always on target and energetic. A stand up comic she performs wacky improvisations about life and business.

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